I did an instagram story about this and many of you have strong opinions/thoughts/strategies around pacific idea. Do my other parents out there allow their kids to use pacifiers? When/in what context? Only for bed? When do you take them away? How?! HELP
We started making it in bed only for bedtime and naps at 1. It was hard with our oldest when our second was only 21 months younger, but he got the hang of it and we took it away just after he turned 2 by popping holes in them. Our daughter was completely different. She didn’t want to give them up at all. We took them away at 2.5, first at naps and then bedtime, just kind of had to go cold turkey and have her watch us toss them so she knew they were gone. Popping holes in them didn’t work at all with her. When she would ask, we would just remind her they were in the trash and give her extra snuggles.
Both of my boys didn’t have one after 9 months, one got sick and couldn’t use it because he couldn’t breath and use it and after he was better I just didn’t give it back, for my youngest son, his older brother his it and by the time I found it, he was fine without it, my daughter had hers until about a year and I just gave it to her less and less. I just know all kids are different, and some need it longer than others
Out of my 3 boys only one used a pacifier. Him and his older brother are 13 months apart, and I’m so glad I had something extra to help sooth him. I never really pushed to get him to break the habit. At age 3 he started chewing holes in them and became uninterested on his own. I quit buying them and we haven’t had any issues. It was totally a self-ween thing. You’re her momma and it is totally your decision how long she has it.
My nephew just turned 2 in January and he loved his paci. He started cutting his two year molars and bit a hole in his paci from chewing on it so much. He chunked his paci and said “yuk.” So we all just went with it and he hasn’t had it in two weeks. Guess you would say we went cold turkey. Every child’s different so what works for one may not work for someone else. Thankfully he got rid of it on his own. Good luck!
You can do so many different variations ! If you use the pacifier throughout the day then you can start by only using it at naps and bedtime. And the after a week or however long you think will be best for your individual child then move to just at bedtime. And then again depending on how they do then start Giving it later in the bedtime routine and then eventually phase it out . We used that and also when it was time to not use the pacifier anymore we went to build a bear and then when your child places the heart inside the bear then they also place their favorite pacifier or multiple inside the bear. And then they know that bear now can help sooth them when they miss their pacifier! This really helps if the child likes stuffed animals! And during the phase out you will have set backs to be expected but it gets easier over time. I think that worked better than cold turkey because then your child also understands depending on their age vs just hiding them or throwing them away.
My son is 9 months and starting around 7 months we started working towards only using a pacifier when he is “contained”… so in the crib, the car seat, the stroller, a shopping cart, etc. Now at 9 months we are down to in the crib or car seat and I keep one handy for stroller/shopping cart but don’t offer it unless needed. Soon I’m hoping to do the same with the car seat and just limit it to bedtime by the time he is one. We also use sized pacifiers (0-6m, 6-18, 18+) and have decided that the size we are in now will be the end. We want more kids and know that it will be way harder to drop the pacifier once a sibling has one so we’re hoping to drop it before a new sibling comes along.
With my first daughter we used a pacifier from day 2. She sucked her thumb in the womb and by 7 months old she ditched the pacifier for her thumb. Our second daughter is 4 months old and has never liked a pacifier, as she’s never been able to keep one in.
Our first used a paci but was done with it by age 2. Our second however is straight up a paci kid. It’s her comfort item for sure and we just go with it. She will be 2 in October. We aren’t even in the realm of thinking of taking it away. Every child so different and every family is different. We know that it would be a harder time for us and her if we try and phase it out so for now we fully embrace the paci.
Trick for weaning off the pacifier!
I have 3 young kids, and all have taken pacifiers. My oldest was extremely attached to his and used it at night until he was almost three. Here was our method to wean: at bedtime we handed him the pacifier and counted as he sucked on it 10 times. Then he put it inside an Easter egg (“to hide the treasure”) and mom and dad took it for the night. At first he acted sad to not have it but we reassured him where it was and that he put it in his egg. The next night it was fewer sucks on the paci and so on. Eventually we threw it away without any sadness.
This method worked because he had control and had the excitement of putting the binky into the Easter egg. He knew exactly where it was so in his mind it wasn’t confusing or lost.
My son is 2 months away from 3. We have been trying to keep it away except naps and bedtime. He has a speech delay so we’ve been trying to break it! My daughter got rid of hers real easy at 2.5 on her own. She is very logical. She woke up one morning and said her mouth tasted bad and I told her it was from the paci. So every time after that when she would ask I would remind her the paci made her mouth taste bad. Poof. Done with it.
This is such a tender subject in the parenting world. People want to throw options out there and think it’s facts or truth. Ultimately the important thing to remember is you’re the parent and you have your child’s best interest at heart. I was a child of a hygienist and so we were weaned off ours around the time our teeth were developing more and we were brushing. Ultimately anything in your mouth (that’s not your tongue) will add bacteria to your mouth/teeth. Whether it’s a pacifier or even a thumb! The biggest thing to remember is hygiene. Brushing after naps, and long periods of time where they have the pacifier in their mouth. To avoid issues related to gum health and such. You also may notice their breath being worse with pacifiers or thumbs/finger suckers. So just focusing on brushing is key! Their teeth will begin to fall out around age 5-6 and so that’s when it’s good to begin to reassess the need for those things. To avoid permanent teeth shifts. However, starting earlier would be good!
Again, ultimately it’s a parents choice. There’s not right or wrong here. But just considering the pros and cons of it all! And remembering that it’s a process for a kiddo. Removing a security they have is a process and it takes a lot of patience and love from momma and dad Remembering it’ll be tough at first but reminding your kiddo the strength and security they have within themselves!
Our policy was, once they are walking, the pacifier is gone. With our son, I took it away one night during his bedtime routine and he never asked for it again. Our daughter is almost 6 months and is a little more attached to hers, but we will keep the same policy. My family and my husband’s family have some orthodontia issues and so I didn’t want to add to any potential problems with prolonged pacifier use.
At one we moved it to night time only for a month and then we took it cold turkey. It actually wasn’t bad she didn’t look for it or cry. Maybe because she was so little still. But more teeth were coming in & we didn’t want them to mess up the structure of her teeth so we took it as soon as she turned one.
Our dentist told us that after 18 months it is best to try to limit just to naps and bedtime and that by 3 it is best not to have it anymore. But no kid graduated from college with a paci so if it’s later, that’s okay too basically their mouth and teeth will correct themselves once they stop using them.
With my oldest, after he turned one we noticed that he would put the pacifier in his mouth but not suck on it. So we started letting him have it only at nap and bed time. He got into the routine that he would hand it to use before we got him out of the crib. Well, a few months before he turned 2, instead of handing it to me one morning, he chucked it and it went behind the crib. We we’re leaving for work and didn’t have time to get it, so we just didn’t give it back to him after that and didn’t have any issues. Now my youngest is 16 months and he seems more attached to his. We only give it to him for naps, bedtime and in the car. So, I would like to have him be done by the age of 2 as well, but we’ll see how it goes lol. My husband and I both had to have braces growing up so my goal was to cut the pacifiers, bottles/sipping cups by 2 to just try and help with maybe not needing braces in the future.
You know your kids the best, so just try and see what might be best for her personality and go with it. I will say that the personality/temper tantrums and being defiant is much stronger when they are 3-4 years old, so the sooner might be the better
With my son (who is a week younger than Drew) when he turned 2 he was then only allowed to have it for naps and at night time. I let him have it during the day when he’s sick, since it’s a comfort item to him. I plan to fully take it away when he turns 3, but I’ll make sure to talk with him about it for a while before it’s gone
Our daughter used one until she was 2. And the main reason we took it away was because it was disrupting her (and ours) sleep when she couldn’t find it in her crib. Then she started requiring having one in her mouth and her hand so we decided we needed to start the process of taking it away. We would have her give it to her stuffed animal in her crib because her ‘stuffy’ needed to use it during the day. So the last few months she only used it during naps and bedtime. Then we did the ‘BigLittleFeelings’ method and had a paci-fairy come and take all the pacifiers away one night and replace them with a little party (a small toy, balloons). She loved it! Never asked for her pacifier again but would talk about her party Good luck!
Our son is same age as Drew. We started weaning at 20m starting with naps and then moving to night time. He was weaned by 23months(July 2021) Even when I had my 2nd in July2021 he still wasn’t interested in his brothers pacifier. It was great!
Until RSV with COVID hit us in December 2021. All the sudden he was asking for it and we gave in because he was miserably sick. Then he was hooked again at night only. So we started all over with weaning again. We are finally 100% weaned as of this week. He still asks for it at night but we just ignore him and walk out the door. We did get a pacifier fairy book to help this time around. He still cries but for like a minute than stops.
I think it really depends on the families lifestyle about when to wean. Our preschool doesn’t allow pacifiers after 24months old. So if they still need for naps that might be problematic. Thankfully there is no right or wrong answer because every kid and family dynamic is different.
We started at 1. Two weeks of only at sleep times. Then two weeks only at bed time. Then it took about 3 nights to break her habit of having it during bedtime. I can’t speak for having a another baby in the house with one. But when she is around other babies with them she tries to take them away.